Jet Lag's a Drag
"I'm not going to make it."
I looked up from the dough I was kneading. It was my first attempt at making scallion pancakes, 蔥油餅 jau4 beng5, and I was engrossed in the task. But noise kept coming from the living room. I poked my head out of the kitchen. Roommate Number One was lying on the couch, one arm slung over her face, in the throes of jet lag. How do you even say "jet lag" in Cantonese? It figures that the dictionary will have "scallion pancake" but no "jet lag."
I glanced at the clock. It was exactly one minute after 8:00.
"Diana, it's barely 8:00pm. You can't go to bed now."
Roommate Number One raised her elbow enough to peek out at me.
"Why not? I went to bed about this early last night."
"No, you went to bead at 10:00."
"I did? Well then...Hey!" She noticed the my grin slipping out. "I did not! What time did I really go to bed? It was around 8:00, right?"
"Ok, no. It was closer to 9:00. But definitely more nine than eight. Come on, you just have to hold on. How about you help me make the scallion pancakes?"
"I don't want to. When is Dana getting back?"
New Roommate had gone to meet up with some old students. I wondered how long it would take for New Roommate to just be Roommate Number 2. Probably not too long, especially since she'd already paid a few bills and bought me coffee beans.
"I don't know. Why don't you do some jumping jacks? How about you go buy me some bok choy? What if I poke you with a needle?" With each suggestion, Roommate Number One shook her head vigorously.
"All right, fine. But I need to keep making these pancakes or it will be midnight before I eat dinner." I hopped back into the kitchen and turned up my music. Maybe obnoxious music would help stave off the jet lag.
Jet lag is a terrible beast, it seems. I'm not affected by it too much usually (knock on wood). The first time I traveled across the globe (high school, Germany), my dad gave me some Tylenol PM to pop. That did the trick, mostly.
Not wanting to become a drug addict, I never have used the Tylenol PM trick again, but I did unwittingly uncovered the secret to avoiding serious jet lag: sleep deprivation.
My next international trip after Germany happened when I was a college student. A high school friend and I planned to wander around the UK for a whole month. And in the day of no smart phones, it really was wandering. The night we embarked, Katie's older brother drove us to the airport at 3:00am to start our journey, and we landed in London at the cheery hour of 6:00am. I don't know how we stayed awake the rest of the day but we somehow made it until bed time.
After college, about the same thing happened when coming to Asia. Left Tulsa at 3:00am, but with all the layovers and long flights, I got in even later, at 11:30pm. Fresh off of finals week, my body was too weary to think about being jet-lagged, so I just slept. And then woke up, and then slept again when it was time.
That's the secret.
Make yourself as tired as possible so that when you arrive, you will definitely sleep. And no cheating if you arrive in the morning. It doesn't matter. Do whatever it takes to keep awake until at least 10:00pm, then sleep. And importantly, do not sleep more than nine hours. Get up, do your thing, have fun. I'm quite extreme, so the longest I ever went was 40+ hours. Good thing one of my talents is surviving on little sleep. Maybe I should join the Marines.
Anyway, I didn't even know I was following this formula until I broke it. I rarely can sleep when upright. Usually I turn into some form of human jello, sliding onto the person next to me, waking myself when I start falling forward, or smashing my head into the window when I start to fall asleep, so that deters me from snoozing on planes. Since I know I can't sleep well, I also drink tons of coffee both before, during, and after my flights. It's more fun to fly caffeinated.
That was until one time I got the whole row to myself. Unwittingly, I thought I was lucky on my Asia to US flight. Little did I know, as I stretched out on the cushy teal seats, that my comfortable flight would result in a whole week of jet lag torture. So that is what everyone was complaining about!
It's really like your head becomes as heavy as a bowling ball. Ok, I know your head literally is as heavy as a bowling ball, but I mean that you can actually feel its weight. Magnets suddenly attach themselves to your eyelids. Your muscles liquify. Your words come out in sluggish, incoherent streams.
Why did I sleep on the plane???
Ever since, I've sworn to never do that again. I've mostly kept my formula except for my second to last trip to Alaska when I got sick mid-flight. That time I still didn't sleep on the plane, but I broke the nine-hour rule on the other side. I slept fourteen hours, successfully kicking my cold but embracing the jet lag. I guess not being able to sleep is better than using up a Costco-sized box of tissues. Although Alaska does actually have Costco, so at least I'd have been prepared.
I was tempted to tell Roommate Number One about my formula, but decided against it. While it works for me, not sure how gung ho she would be about staying up for so long. This is the girl who is doing well to make it to 11:00 on a good day.
When a song with screaming popped up, I didn't even skip it. Maybe it would keep her eyelids open. I rolled out a thin layer of dough sprinkled green onions thickly. I briefly considered grinding up some Tylenol PM and putting it in her pancake but wondered if I'd be breaking some kind of law.
But when I swung back into the living room with my plate of flaky pancake, the couch was empty. She had succumbed.
Oh well, I'll just give her pancake to New Roommate. Good thing I hadn't added any drugs. The metal gate squeaked as New Roommate walked. Fortuitous timing on her part.
She grabbed a half a pancake and some roasted cabbage to go with it. She said it was good, flavorful, not too undercooked. I decided on the spot that she can be upgraded. Roommate Number Two it is!
"So Dana. Do you know how to avoid jet lag?"
I looked up from the dough I was kneading. It was my first attempt at making scallion pancakes, 蔥油餅 jau4 beng5, and I was engrossed in the task. But noise kept coming from the living room. I poked my head out of the kitchen. Roommate Number One was lying on the couch, one arm slung over her face, in the throes of jet lag. How do you even say "jet lag" in Cantonese? It figures that the dictionary will have "scallion pancake" but no "jet lag."
I glanced at the clock. It was exactly one minute after 8:00.
"Diana, it's barely 8:00pm. You can't go to bed now."
Roommate Number One raised her elbow enough to peek out at me.
"Why not? I went to bed about this early last night."
"No, you went to bead at 10:00."
"I did? Well then...Hey!" She noticed the my grin slipping out. "I did not! What time did I really go to bed? It was around 8:00, right?"
"Ok, no. It was closer to 9:00. But definitely more nine than eight. Come on, you just have to hold on. How about you help me make the scallion pancakes?"
"I don't want to. When is Dana getting back?"
New Roommate had gone to meet up with some old students. I wondered how long it would take for New Roommate to just be Roommate Number 2. Probably not too long, especially since she'd already paid a few bills and bought me coffee beans.
"I don't know. Why don't you do some jumping jacks? How about you go buy me some bok choy? What if I poke you with a needle?" With each suggestion, Roommate Number One shook her head vigorously.
"All right, fine. But I need to keep making these pancakes or it will be midnight before I eat dinner." I hopped back into the kitchen and turned up my music. Maybe obnoxious music would help stave off the jet lag.
Jet lag is a terrible beast, it seems. I'm not affected by it too much usually (knock on wood). The first time I traveled across the globe (high school, Germany), my dad gave me some Tylenol PM to pop. That did the trick, mostly.
Not wanting to become a drug addict, I never have used the Tylenol PM trick again, but I did unwittingly uncovered the secret to avoiding serious jet lag: sleep deprivation.
My next international trip after Germany happened when I was a college student. A high school friend and I planned to wander around the UK for a whole month. And in the day of no smart phones, it really was wandering. The night we embarked, Katie's older brother drove us to the airport at 3:00am to start our journey, and we landed in London at the cheery hour of 6:00am. I don't know how we stayed awake the rest of the day but we somehow made it until bed time.
After college, about the same thing happened when coming to Asia. Left Tulsa at 3:00am, but with all the layovers and long flights, I got in even later, at 11:30pm. Fresh off of finals week, my body was too weary to think about being jet-lagged, so I just slept. And then woke up, and then slept again when it was time.
That's the secret.
Make yourself as tired as possible so that when you arrive, you will definitely sleep. And no cheating if you arrive in the morning. It doesn't matter. Do whatever it takes to keep awake until at least 10:00pm, then sleep. And importantly, do not sleep more than nine hours. Get up, do your thing, have fun. I'm quite extreme, so the longest I ever went was 40+ hours. Good thing one of my talents is surviving on little sleep. Maybe I should join the Marines.
Anyway, I didn't even know I was following this formula until I broke it. I rarely can sleep when upright. Usually I turn into some form of human jello, sliding onto the person next to me, waking myself when I start falling forward, or smashing my head into the window when I start to fall asleep, so that deters me from snoozing on planes. Since I know I can't sleep well, I also drink tons of coffee both before, during, and after my flights. It's more fun to fly caffeinated.
That was until one time I got the whole row to myself. Unwittingly, I thought I was lucky on my Asia to US flight. Little did I know, as I stretched out on the cushy teal seats, that my comfortable flight would result in a whole week of jet lag torture. So that is what everyone was complaining about!
It's really like your head becomes as heavy as a bowling ball. Ok, I know your head literally is as heavy as a bowling ball, but I mean that you can actually feel its weight. Magnets suddenly attach themselves to your eyelids. Your muscles liquify. Your words come out in sluggish, incoherent streams.
Why did I sleep on the plane???
Ever since, I've sworn to never do that again. I've mostly kept my formula except for my second to last trip to Alaska when I got sick mid-flight. That time I still didn't sleep on the plane, but I broke the nine-hour rule on the other side. I slept fourteen hours, successfully kicking my cold but embracing the jet lag. I guess not being able to sleep is better than using up a Costco-sized box of tissues. Although Alaska does actually have Costco, so at least I'd have been prepared.
I was tempted to tell Roommate Number One about my formula, but decided against it. While it works for me, not sure how gung ho she would be about staying up for so long. This is the girl who is doing well to make it to 11:00 on a good day.
When a song with screaming popped up, I didn't even skip it. Maybe it would keep her eyelids open. I rolled out a thin layer of dough sprinkled green onions thickly. I briefly considered grinding up some Tylenol PM and putting it in her pancake but wondered if I'd be breaking some kind of law.
But when I swung back into the living room with my plate of flaky pancake, the couch was empty. She had succumbed.
Oh well, I'll just give her pancake to New Roommate. Good thing I hadn't added any drugs. The metal gate squeaked as New Roommate walked. Fortuitous timing on her part.
She grabbed a half a pancake and some roasted cabbage to go with it. She said it was good, flavorful, not too undercooked. I decided on the spot that she can be upgraded. Roommate Number Two it is!
"So Dana. Do you know how to avoid jet lag?"
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